Eh, what are you going to do?

Dear Readers,

While taking a trip down memory lane today, I stumbled upon an amusing yet jarring memory. Amusing for others. Jarring for me. This incident took place when I was quite small. I really tried to jog my memory to get a ballpark figure of my age but all that my brain could cough up was “Quite small”. Eh, what are you going to do? My parents and I were on a holiday in Goa. My recollection starts off pleasant enough. Strolling down an over-crowded beach with my hands and mouth preoccupied with devouring a cob of corn with the sun setting in the background. Okay, to be honest, the taste of the corn is my only vivid recollection.. the probability of being on a beach( I mean it’s Goa!) with the sun present somewhere in the sky is fairly high.

Maybe my small size made me extra vulnerable. Maybe the sight of me attacking the corn with such fervor was really off-putting but either way I found myself being chased by a cow. That’s right, a COW! Now Readers, there are moments in life that strong arm you into prioritising. And any person in their right mind would choose safety over a corn cob. Not me. Nuh uh. The corn cob and I were one entity. So me, my misguided zeal, and my recently added appendage ran like a maniac fuelled by their nonsensical priorities.

Had this incident taken place outside of India, any neutral party would have declared the cow guilty, and me, just plain crazy. However, in this country, most people’s assessment of the situation would have been clouded by the deep emotional bonds that they have with cows. I understand that they are harmless – not in my experience – but to others, perhaps. Even though I am a little weary of them, I will be gracious enough to admit that their innocent, gigantic eyes do have an endearing effect, and their contribution to providing me with tasty dairy products is much appreciated.

Through the journey of telling you this story, two thoughts struck me. The first one – Why were we holidaying on a beach? We hailed from Mumbai – a place with abundant beaches. Strange. Secondly, why was the cow holidaying on the beach? Come to think of it, their taste in real estate is quite lousy. Why would they spend all their time on our roads amidst us? I mean, let’s admit it, even on our best days, we are tolerable company at best.

Wait a second, have we compelled these creatures to endure our company and compete for our corn cobs? Could the haphazard planning of our country and complete disregard for other creatures have something to do with the accidental sharing of holiday destinations? *Sigh* When did my unreasonable rant turn into sympathy for the nemesis.

Maybe this reality is one that I’ll just have to live with – a cow squatting in the middle of the road, chewing on a blade of grass and the rest of the city whizzing past it… accepting diversity – taken to a whole new level. Eh, what are you going to do?

Yours – in need of a better nemesis,

Panya

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